Me: I'm hungry.
Mom: You're always hungry.
Me: I'm like Garfield only cuter.
Mom: And nicer.
Me: But just as sarcastic.
Ah, the joys of a liberal arts education.
Later, Mom said the word crack at the chiropractor which he doesn't like to here. So he has this thing during the month of December where you pay him a buck (which he donates to Big Brother Big Sister), every time you say it. So afterward, Mom walks up to him and asks "So how much for crack?"
Yes, folks, this has been my morning. Oh, and a word to the wise, don't bother going through the drive-through if your driver's voice is shot.