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Today spuds16 and I went to Big Apple Bagel. Yummy! This may be the last bagel sandwich I get from them for a long time. I'm starting to say my good-byes. And it's weird!
I've officially talked to three people about their high school schedules. It's strange realizing I'm not going to be joining them. No more high school is kind of weird. It's weird thinking I won't be in the cafeteria eating Italian Dunkers. It's weird realizing I won't see my teachers who know me and say "hi". In less than a week, I'll be in a totally new environment. I remember what that was like at GDB. But it wasn't so bad because we all had one thing in common: we all wanted a Guide Dog. It was a great experience. I'm hoping college is as good. I don't want to hate it. I'm sure it will be fine once I'm there. There is a part of me that's getting excited. The pain is a factor in my fear and I know that. I think the appointment with the doctor is making me more nervous. I'm not sure what result would be best anymore.
Two weeks from tomorrow, I should know what's wrong. Or at least know what could be wrong. Or know absolutely nothing. Or maybe wish I knew nothing. I never expected things to turn out this way. I'm starting to get excited for classes, but the foot is worrying me and I'm just afraid that there'll be difficulties. What if they make me use crutches. Those of you who know me well know how uncoordinated I am. I can't use crutches! Or if I did, I'd need help. One thing is for sure though, it's not going to ruin my fall semester. I will not let it make me fail. I've finally started to feel excited and realize that there is a chance to do great things at college and I'm not going to let this foot get me down. Now talk to me in another hour and you'll probably get a different response!


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Aug. 29th, 2005 09:59 pm (UTC)
*grin* don't you just love the mood swings when you're contemplating a new situation? but in all seriousness from someone who's spent a number of years in college, it's definitely very different from high school, and it is a big adjustment, but i think you'll find that you'll have more in common with folks up there than you know. there are so many different groups that no matter what you're interested in, there are going to be people who are more than eager to help you get involved and settled in.

if you can manage it, taking some sort of elective class (underwater basket weaving?) means that the other people in the class are there because they share that same interest, not just because it's a requirement. i came from a kinda small high school, so everything was new to me, but in my very first class i met something like three people who ended up being some of my closest friends.

*smiles* and having julio will be a wonderful way to meet people. when i'm out with xiomar, my white german shepherd service dog, i can't even count how many people stop to talk with me or ask about him.

*zen hugs* hang in there. being nervous and exhilarated all at once is perfectly normal! and it does get better. i'll keep my fingers crossed that all goes well with the foot. and if there's anything at all i can do to reassure you or any questions i could answer, just let me know.

i know i'm pretty much a complete stranger, but i was pointed towards your journal on one of my service dog email lists as a wonderful bit of writing about going through the whole process of getting (and being trained by) a guide dog, especially while dealing with school. it's a great comfort and wonderful reassurance to realize that things can turn out so well. *smile* i might just make it yet!
Aug. 30th, 2005 02:21 am (UTC)
Don't be nervous, it'll go fine. College'll be fun. i mean it'll be hard to adjust to at first, but I bet you'll enjoy it! I'm sure your foot will work out okay too. Take good care. :D
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